Month: October 2016

On Embracing Your Light

It can be appalling to know that a grown adult would seek to dim the light of a 24-year-old. But many of us know, that no matter what age or background, there will be people that would rather see others as inferior to them than to embrace and encourage individuals to be all that they can be. I’m not speaking about anything new here. This is not something that hasn’t already been discussed over and over again in many forms. And yet, here we are, some of us having already understood the problematic nature of comparison, microaggressions and the desire to feel validated via feeding the insecurities of others. There is something quite profound in knowing that your very existence has the potential to crack a thunderstorm in someone else’s clouds. All you can do is continue to be a rainbow for those who are seeking to calm the storm; allowing the ones who are busy creating dark skies to keep doing so, because after all, it is not your job to fix them. But even so, being surrounded by too …

How Embracing My Femininity Released Me from My Ex-Lover’s Approval

I pricked my finger on David’s line of vision and couldn’t get enough of his attention. He told me he loved me and wanted to be with me, yet still one thing was clear: he wasn’t completely attracted to me. While I sought to pursue this image of what he wanted, I found myself spiraling out of grip, scrambling to keep up with the sexually appealing nature of my contemporaries. Toned bodies laced in leather choking at each joint, jaw lines that ran forever, eyes like whirlpools sucking in every Instagram follower, masculinity: dirty and raw. These men were who he wanted. In January, he sparked an essay I posted about breaking out of my supposed ‘lane’ and embracing my own sexually aggressive nature, owning my sexuality at the forefront versus keeping it within until brought forth when comfortable. My social feeds were filled with images of who I wanted to be, of the men I knew David wished I could be, and I came up short each time under my own guise. “I could be like that,” I …

The Next Chapter

Photo by Sara Nevels. Two years ago I was fresh out of college without a plan and no direction. All I knew was that I wanted to live between an intersection as both artist and career-woman, building a life that allowed me to grow in both. I made the decision to follow my career path first and it has brought me to an understanding of myself and my creativity I wouldn’t have known while sitting in my room simply dreaming up ideas. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, planning and dreaming isn’t always the best approach, it’s the doing that advances you toward your life purpose, and in action is when you are able to transform. Looking back I see I was getting glimpses as to who I would become, and now I’m beginning to take form with confidence and strength. Can’t believe I’ll be 25 in two months. Yay for self-awareness. More related articles: Reinventing Your Future Know Your Worth The Lesson I Learned In Letting Go of a Toxic Lover

The Lesson I Learned In Letting Go of a Toxic Lover

Photo by Noemi Gonzalez.  This had gone beyond simply: “wrapped around his finger.” This was barbed wire coiled up within my sheets, trapping me inside my bed, leaving me too weak to even fight it. So all I did was sleep, hoping that one day I would understand that he and I were meant to be. But beneath my skin I knew that we were not. Sometimes two people develop an insane and passionate connection quickly–not for the purpose of being together in a healthy and loving relationship–but to pair perfectly with each other’s darkest inner selves. It sounds frightening, I know, but at the time it all went down, I didn’t seem to notice it. Being with him was like dancing with the devil. I felt alive, I felt free, I felt wild. I felt as if I could reach my full potential and destroy my empathetic nature to free myself from caring about the well being of other people. He brought out the beast in me that sought to succeed and do well by becoming malicious, conniving and destructive. With David, I felt …