Month: September 2012

Free Yourself

Countless Google searches on hair transplant surgery, cheek implants, jawline surgery, liposuction, teeth surgery, rhinoplasty and eye shape surgery only made me more depressed about my self-esteem. All of these things I wanted to fix about myself began to consume my life. It took a lot of prayers to get me to where I am now, and although I may not be completely comfortable with my face + body, I’ve reached a higher level of acceptance; I’ve accepted myself. We may live in an image driven society but it would be nothing without the people who refused to fall into the dangerous pit of “self-loathing.” So let this be the first time I have ever told anyone, ever, about my battle with accepting the way I look, a struggle beginning at the age of 5, and continuing on into a state of depression just this past year. I contemplated sharing something so personal about myself, especially because I am just now beginning this blog, but I figured I’d do it now while people are still …

Diary of a Gay Spinster

spinster |ˈspinstər| noun an unmarried woman, typically an older woman beyond the usual age for marriage. So the definition doesn’t necessarily fit me, but at the same time it fits all too well. I am nowhere close to being a woman, unless of course you’re a stranger on the phone with me, who’s courteous language includes, “yes, ma’am/no, ma’am.” I guess I just sound like a woman. And ‘beyond the usual age for marriage’? That’s not even legal for me yet. Especially not in the hot & lovely state of Arizona. So what is it then? Well, I am a 20-year-old college student who spends his weekends working and catching up on the DVR, with the occasional dinner night out at some restaurant chain that has commercials played on television regularly, sometimes the casual movie goer. I love gas station food a little too much, I post pictures on Instagram almost everyday, just to feel like I’m doing something interesting and hope people care, judge anyone who’s full of themselves, but really just secretly jealous …